And then I just thought “fuck it! If I don’t do it now I’ll never do it”. Seconds later “Booking confirmation” pops up at my screen. I did it? Yes, I really did it!
– November 2017.
But let’s start from the beginning. It was 2015 and I just graduated from school. I was full of excitement because I was just about to go to university in Düsseldorf and start a new life. A life on my own. New city, new country, new flat, new environment, university instead of school, just everything was new. Living on my own, one of the best things. A few weeks into university I got used to it and these new things became more and more a routine. I started to learn, a lot, and just lived the normal student life. But as I sat down in the library day after day I started to question myself if it would be all? Will I study the next five years and go straight into my first job and earn my money, having a family and living a normal and quiet life? Just as my parents did it? They are happy, no matter what, but do I want the same? Or do I want to do something exiting and start a little bit later with all of this? So, the idea of doing a WorldTravel came into my mind. I was completely excited about the idea to travel around the world, on my own, just with a backpack. I dreamed about waking up in a tent in Australia, beach and sunrise in front of me, or hiking in the jungle of Brazil. Everything appeared perfect.
But it didn’t last long till the first questions arise. Do I want to travel on my own for such a long time? From where do I get the money, and do I want to ‘lose’ one year? There were a million doubts but the idea, how amazing this could and would be, was stronger. “So, before I do one year on my own I want to try it for 2 weeks”, I thought. Two weeks later I booked an interrail ticket to travel for two weeks across Scandinavia. It was such a good idea! I meet so many people and had such a good time. After these two weeks I came back to Germany and the idea of doing a WorldTravel was even stronger.
But as time passed, and the next semester started I had to focus on my studies. Soon after I met a girl. A dancer, incredibly beautiful and with a smile that would give me this special feeling in my stomach every time I saw it. Everything seemed perfect. I was completely lost and so in love that I forgot about everything, also about my WorldTravel plans. As time passed we got a couple and it was an amazing time. We had so much fun and did crazy things. We were together for eight months when I left Germany to study aboard in Dublin. At first everything was good. But soon after she started to act different. Two weeks later everything came to an end. She said she never really loved me. At least not the way it would be enough for a relationship. My world felt apart.
It sounds like a sad story, but read in the next post how this would change everything in my life.